An Easter Memory
(or as we called it, Resurrection Sunday)
When I was a young teen, I had very crooked teeth. My canine teeth were stuck halfway in because there was no room for them to come in all the way. I knew that braces were expensive, and my parents couldn’t afford them. So one Easter I decided that I was going to believe for my teeth to be fixed.
In my post Great Expectations, I described how I grew up being told that I could have perfect health if I just believed.
Although this was supposed to be true all of the time, Easter (or as we called it, Resurrection Sunday) carried extra weight.
The Way International (TWI) taught that because the Bible says, “by His stripes we are healed,” that Christ’s suffering was what earned us our right to healing from God. When we took communion, the wine that represented Christ’s blood was for our sins and the bread that represented Christ’s body was for our healing.
We usually only took communion on Easter Sunday, and it was a solemn occasion. Although we were usually a casual group, most people wore their best on Easter Sunday. We were supposed to focus on what the blood and body meant. Even though we were should believe for healing anytime something was wrong with our bodies, Easter carried a special significance.
That Easter Sunday, I’m sure I recited verses about healing in my head all morning. I remember taking my sip of juice and slowly chewing my bit of bread with a nervous anticipation. Afterwards, I secretly crept to a mirror to see the results. My teeth looked exactly the same.
Eventually, my parents did find a way to pay for braces, but I never forgot the guilt and shame I felt at my inability to believe.
Looking back now, I wish I could tell my teenage self that that weight should never have been on my shoulders. That I was expected to do things that were impossible. That the disappointment I felt that Easter Sunday should not have been directed at me, but the lies I was told and those responsible for them.
❤️🩹 I'm a cult survivor, too. It's rough recovering! Easier when meeting others who get it. You get it. 💪